It’s time for another Running and Reading Long post! (yes, it’s a little earlier – I’ll be out for the next few day!) And guess what?! We get to talk about Second Wind!!! Wahoo! Second Wind, by Cami Ostman was an incredible book and I have been thinking about the lessons I learned for the last week and a half. Wouldn’t you know it? That’s exactly what we are supposed to be talking about!
The first question is did Second Wind make me think differently about running…
The answer is a unequivical YES! Cami is not a “fast” runner. Her marathon times are around 5 hours and while she never talks about her specific mile pace she does say how she is usually at the back of the pack. If you have come around this blog a bit, you know I have slowed down in the last year and half. I have been whining about said slow down A LOT. But after reading this book I realized what a gift it is to be able to run in the first place. Does this sound cheesy? Maybe… but Cami talks a lot about what she learns about herself through running and a major part of this is simply appreciating being out pounding the pavement.
I am embracing my current speed with open arms! I do want to get faster – it’s fun :) But I am also not going to beat myself up and continue to get down on myself. Running for me, is very mental. Yesterday I went out and ran 4 miles at a 10 min pace, which was 40 seconds faster per mile than a run I did last week. Two of those miles were under a 10 min pace. Why? Because I knew I could do it. I pushed myself for sure but I also told myself, “you ARE mentally strong”. This is becoming my new running mantra. The other aspect of this is I want to help others embrace their pace as well! How often do we read (or write) “I did x many miles at x pace, which is fast for me” Why are we qualifying and downgrading our hard-won efforts?!
I don’t think Kara Goucher is going to read my blog and think, “wow, she thinks a 9:50 mile is fast?!” Nope, if Kara were to actually read this blog (and Kara you are more than welcome too!!) I believe she would applaud me for working hard, celebrating my personal victories and because I love running! I also don’t believe anyone else would read this and think that either. So, join me in celebrating our times from the roof tops – no matter what they are!!
The next question to focus on is if Ostman’s story has made me think differently about life…
Again, YES! Ostman writes how she has spent a huge part of her life being a people pleaser and this rang true with me. I, too, feel the need to be “a good girl” and make sure others are happy even if it’s at a personal cost. I have been working on this the last few years so I feel it’s a work in progress. One aspect I am working on? I am trying to stop apologizing – I apologize for EVERYTHING! Even things that are in no way my fault. Or I apologize for some non-existent error I perceived I made. Learning to let go of my imaginary ability to control the world means learning to accept I can’t be perfect no matter how hard I try. While this can certainly seem like a HUGE load off my shoulders, it’s also scary! :)
I also loved how Cami’s running took her on a quest – one to better herself, challenge herself and completely broaden her horizons. While not all of us can run a marathon on every continent, I think it’s great how BIG Cami’s quest was. Why not think BIG!? Sometimes, I get nervous to think big; it’s scary to fail and when you have a big plan and it doesn’t turn out this means a big failure. The last couple of years, I have been really afraid of failure. Oops – see the connection with the need to be perfect? Jumping in feet first is not something new to me though – I’ve been known to throw caution to the wind, just not lately. I think after my break up in November and then my mom passing in December I started waking up to this and decided to make some changes. It’s a process but it’s one I am welcoming.
Training!! Wahoooo! I started mapping out marathon training and taking a closer look at my training for the 1/2 that’s in July. Right now I feel I am on a good track with training and yesterday I joined our local Y for a month. Our pool is closed until July and they closed our track on Monday – boo! Maintenance-schmaintenance! After Ragnar this weekend (!!!!!!) I’m kicking off my cross training like a champ! I need/want to step my hills – eek! which I am also going to be working on next week. But I do know, I AM mentally strong!