make my big decision

Here’s the scoop… many moons ago I did my first half marathon.  I was super nervous!  I joined a local run camp that met every Saturday morning during the winter.  I did it with my friend (we alternated driving) and then I met two incredible people/running partners that helped me power through.  I always knew I needed and wanted to meet up with them.

1:2 with my medal

I finished in 2:04, which I was and still am, damn proud of.  It currently stands as my PR and as you can see by the goofy grin on my face I was overflowing with excitement.  Then I kind of fell off the quality training track.  Part of me was a bit burned out and the other part was the lack of structure.  Don’t get me wrong, I really enjoyed sleeping in on Saturdays again (we got up and running around 8 am if memory serves) but I also knew it helped me cross the finish line strong.

can I do this?
can I do this?

So, there is another training camp starting on June 21st.  It’s 18 weeks long and can either be 1/2 marathon training or the full 26.2.  Since I have the Detroit marathon on the docket I would use this as my training.  It’s $120 for the entire duration and offers Saturday runs, a weekly run if you want to and track sessions.  Training camp will end the week after my race so it’s perfect timing really.

What’s the problem?  Saturday runs START at 7 am.  Not to mention, I haven’t been very good with sticking with a training plan since that first 1/2.  My discipline is kind of in the toilet and I’m very good at putting off what I could do today until tomorrow (or the next day).  I’m worried I will lay down the cash and then drift by the wayside.

thomas jefferson doesn’t look too impressed

On the other hand, I want to do WELL in Detroit.  I’m eager to hit a time that starts with a 4 rather than a 5.  It may seem silly but I want to cross the finish line feeling like I did when I crossed the finish line of the Dopey – that I gave it my all.

dopey 1/2 bib/medal

By the way, did you know I sometimes wear my Dopey medal around when I’m at home?

I’m probably making a decision based on this post.  I’m just doubting my follow through.  I need encouragement.  I need accountability.  I need some confidence.  I need… something.  Clearly.  The first day of camp will be the weekend of my Charlevoix 1/2 marathon but I’m not too worried about this as I can jump in the next weekend.

One more thing.  I signed up for camp one other time in the past – probably two winters ago?  First time around I was in the 10 min pace group.  I certainly didn’t belong there the next time around and our first run I was huffing and puffing long behind the rest of the group.  So much so that one of the coaches was hanging back simply to make sure I didn’t get lost.  I was deeply embarrassed and felt like a failure.  At least when I train on my own, I’m the only one to witness those unfortunate running days.

a pretty accurate description of my those running days

What do you think after reading all of this?  Share your words of wisdom!  Make my decision!

running realizations

Yesterday I had a good run.  I was sitting on the couch after a long day of work.  I didn’t want to go running.  I was grouchy.  My hand hurt.  I was tired (actually not super tired but enough so I used it as an excuse).  And then there was just this, “I don’t want to get off of the couch” feeling.  But I used these excuses the day before so I needed to buck up, buttercup.

So, at 7:20 pm, I got up, changed and went for it.  I have reversed my normal route, which has two really tough hills.  My hand has been hurting when running as I haven’t been wearing my ace bandage when I go.  Finally, I clued in this was a bad idea since all of the jostling wasn’t doing me any favors.  Thankfully, the less amount of hand pain offset the pain in my lungs and legs!

I also wore my new shoes outside for the first time.  At first they felt a little off in the heel area but soon they were comfortable.  I definitely can feel the higher heel drop as my piriformis acted up a bit.  I concentrated on landing mid-foot and this will need to be more of a focus.  Considering I will be wearing these for the 25k on Saturday (I don’t have a choice, the Hokas are causing blisters and my other shoes are shot), it should be interesting.

The funny part is, there were times when I was keeping some good time.  My phone would show my current pace and it would be 10:07.  I swear, lifting my knees and turning my feet over faster has completely changed my running.  HOWEVER, I don’t have the endurance/fitness to keep up with this!  I had to walk a couple of times and/or stop and catch my breath.  My overall pace was about 11:15 including these breaks.  The nice part is knowing I can hit these numbers again.  For a long time I just figured I had lost all speed and couldn’t physically do it anymore.  Realizing I simply wasn’t picking up my feet is a major boost.  Endurance and fitness can be earned the more effort I put into it.

wahoo – run fast!

Yesterday was also a moment of truth.  I did 5.75 miles.  I couldn’t get the last .25 as I got a work call otherwise I would have finished 6.  This run made me realize Saturday is going to be painful.  I’ve been fooling myself into thinking 15 miles was totally doable.  While I still believe I can finish it, I’ve adjusted my goals to comply with my current running fitness.  Here is my plan:

1.  Enjoy the run.  Last time I did this race I put SO MUCH pressure on myself and set some very unrealistic goals.  At the end I was crying because I missed the mark and was incredibly disappointed in myself.  I don’t want to repeat this.  I made sure to enjoy my Dopey experience and plan on repeating this mindset.  I’m also wearing my Minnie polka dot skirt for funsies.

Minnie mouse skirt and zen-y attitude... I'm ready
Minnie mouse skirt and zen-y attitude… I’m ready

2.  Embrace the pain – physically and mentally.  I’m preparing for it.  I have a mantra.  There isn’t anything I can do about it now so accepting it is the first step – in my opinion.  My legs will hurt and I will want to give up – I refuse to.

3.  Not go out too fast!  I’ve noticed on my last few training runs I have shot out of the cannon and then wanted to crawl through the rest of the miles.  I’m a huge fan of negative splits (aren’t we all??) so I need to keep my mind and body focused on slow and steady.

this illustrates what happens to a “T”

4.  The first three miles always suck for me.  It’s one of the reasons I’m not a huge fan of 5k’s.  It takes me this long to warm up and typically it dampens my spirit.  Thoughts like, “is this going to be how the rest of the run will be?!” bombard my brain.  Despite knowing things will get better it’s hard to get my head on track and my spirit sinks a bit.  Again, accepting this and relaxing.

5.  Realistic goals. A) Finish. B) Under 3:30.  C) Under 3:15.  D) Under 3 hrs.  I’ve decided to wear my garmin but not have it show pace.  I will keep it on regular watch mode so I can track my progress but not get caught up in the numbers.

Ha!  This is a bit of a long post.  Clearly there are some things on my mind.  I focused on running today because it’s been an up and down week and I don’t like moaning and groaning too much on here.  Or at least I don’t want to today!  Hope you enjoy your Wednesday!

fight the urge to compare!

A while back I wrote about how I didn’t cry when I crossed the finish line of my first marathon.  Everyone told me I would since I just completed this huge experience but I didn’t.  I was proud I finished but disappointed because I thought I would do better.  I wrote how I was hoping to have this major flood of emotion when I crossed the finish line in the final race of the Dopey Challenge.

I should be crying after all of these miles, right?
I should be crying after all of these miles, right?

And I did.  I cried a bit and was bursting with pride… but not for long.  First of all, I was surrounded by people who had just completed the Dopey.  There were 7,000 of us total who attempted and I am not sure what the final total was who finished but I am thinking most people did.  Then there was the conversation I overheard the night before the marathon on the bus back to my hotel.  The gentleman said, “I’m doing the Goofy.  I didn’t get into the Dopey but seriously, the Dopey is the same as the Goofy with just a few training runs before it.”  Hmmm… sour grapes much?

It did kind of stick with me though – was this really a big deal?  Was it simply a couple of training runs?  I thought about this and remembered earlier that day while running the half my legs were indeed, fatigued from the two days prior.  So, I (essentially) stamped out that little bit of doubt.

Of course, missing the under six hour mark by two minutes stuck in my craw a bit!  Haha, I know this is beyond ridiculous!  Pretty soon I did hear stories of others who finished the marathon portion of Dopey MUCH speedier than me and I started wondering if what I just did was actually all that great.

When I got home, I had two friends in particular who pointed out how proud of myself I should be.  In fact, they both said “I hope you are proud of yourself…”.  Not to mention, these weren’t two of my friends who I would have ever expected this from.  Hmm… is there a sign on my forehead describing how I downplay my achievements?!

My mom used to do this all the time.  She was an amazing artist but could never see it on her own.  It drove me nuts.  She would constantly compare herself to others.  Sound familiar?  When I realized I am guilty of the same thing I knew it was a habit that had to stop.  The achievements of others only over shadows mine if I make it so.

There are loads of memes out there that talk about this phenomenon so I know it’s common.  I don’t want to do it anymore.  It’s silly and feeling proud of myself is such a GREAT feeling!  Not to mention, when/if I have kids of my own I don’t want to pass this along to them.  While it’s part of human nature, I can make it less of a part of my nature.  It is something I need to commit to, I already know it.  It’s very similar to breaking my habit of amping up my anxiety by playing situations/conversations over and over again in my mind.  By saying “stop” out loud, I’ve been curbing this pattern and it has helped!

So, I am confident I can change this about myself.  Besides, who doesn’t want to embrace their accomplishments?!  Heck beyond embracing them, CELEBRATING them!

in style of course

how is it possible NOT to appreciate a snow day?!

Alright, I don’t have wee small children so I am guessing having the whole day to myself is probably a little different from attempting to entertain the kiddies.  Especially when going outside freezes their face “that way”.

I, on the other hand, embraced a snow day with open arms!  Yes, I still needed to work a bit but it was from home, on my couch, snuggled in a blanket.  It was wonderful.

this is how it felt  as I was working

Yesterday, I worked, cuddled with Simon while taking a nap and then did some running!  Wahoo!  The couch’s siren call is much greater than my treadmill’s but I got it done.  I did 6.2 miles and there were a few surprises:

1.  It was the longest I’ve run since Dopey.

2.  When I first started running, I almost felt like I had forgotten how!  I ran last week so this was a weird new calf learning how to walk thing.

or a dog in socks

3.  I did some running in my Hokas.  At first it was very strange.  I mean they are comfortable and not heavy at all, just different.

4.  After running in them for about a mile and half it started to feel more normal.  Usually, I’m a bit stop and go on the treadmill but I fell into a decent rhythm.  I’m going to credit the shoes.

5.  I did four miles in the Hokas, after doing the first two in my Brooks.  I don’t think I will run much more than that at a time until they are broken in a bit more so my feet and legs get accustomed.

used this to ice my ank
used this to ice my wonky ankle

6.  I can’t quite tell if the shoes are too big or not.  I tried them on at the Disney expo and the woman who fit me said “these feel about right”.  Is this a definitive answer?  Am I over thinking this?  They feel big but let’s face it, these shoes don’t look the most streamlined so I can’t tell.  I ordered a pair of 8’s so I can do a comparison to the 8.5.  At first, I felt my heel slipping out but once I tightened the laces it was better.  Enter some neurosis about wanting the PERFECT shoe.  Seriously, it’s an illness.

7.  I got to look at my beautiful organizational handiwork!

ooo - so pretty!
ooo – so pretty!

I know folks talk about how they lose fitness and whatnot if they aren’t running much.  Yesterday’s run felt great and the lack of pressure was welcomed with open arms.  I didn’t realize how much I fixated on the challenge with every run.  Many thoughts that consisted of, “if you can’t run x distance today how are you going to run 48.6?” or “if you don’t do this run you are never going to make it through the whole weekend!”  You know, lots of self-support going on there!

But things have changed.  As previously mentioned, Mile 14 changed my running world a bit and gave me the boost of ego that I needed!  Oh look, this picture just happened to fall into this post!

I might actually frame this
I might actually frame this

Happy winter y’all!

I’m snobby about my oranges

Want to hear something ridiculous?  I am crazy about Cutie oranges!  But they MUST be Cuties – none of the other brands will do.  I’m certain others feel this way because other brands use the exact same colors as Cuties despite their bogus camouflage.  Sorry Clemin-Tinas and *Lil’ Darlin’s – just because you have blue and orange packaging doesn’t make you a Cutie.

If you want to read something really creepy, read this:  14 Creepiest things kids have said about an imaginary friend.  I’m not kidding…

Monday I had a dentist appointment and surprise!  It was time to get a filling!  As ungrateful as I sound, it was very nice of them to do it on the spot.  This way it goes on 2013’s deductible.  I will say, I wasn’t quite prepared for major numb face (all the way up to my eyes!) and my meeting that immediately followed was entertaining.

This past weekend I got to meet my dear friend’s little bundle of joy!  She is absolutely adorable and is so tiny.  She has just reached 6 lbs status so I gave her a high five for gaining some weight.  I wanted to snuggle her for hours.  And yes, I completely hogged her and only gave her to another friend to hold when I had to go to the bathroom!

Kara also brought some white chicken chili and it was delicious.  I made a white chicken chili two years ago and something went wrong along the way.  Or I had a dud recipe and the boyfriend at the time told me it was only ‘eh’ so I didn’t bookmark that one.  I was pleasantly surprised and I’ll post the link when I make it.

Running was a no-go on Monday considering I was hopped up on numbing business and a pain killer <— I was being a wimp.  Unfortunately, a massive headache followed suit yesterday since I had the gall to let a dentist touch my head.  I’m not kidding, I am a mega wuss when it comes to brain but it’s so easily aggitated!  However, I finally got off of my bum this morning!  Yay!  I was extremely proud of myself for getting out of bed.  It’s just in time too because Monday was the official “one month away!” from the Dopey Challenge!  Oops, I nervous vomited a bit!

hopefully you all saw this gif coming

It’s weird because I’ve been talking about it forever and now it’s almost here.  My training has taken a dip these last couple of weeks.  I need to kick my own arse because I was doing so well there and then I essentially jumped the shark.  I was all zen about it before and now it’s time to hit the all-freak-out-systems-go button and lock this s*%t down.

Naturally, it’s easier to say than do but I keep thinking about how I started crying during last year’s race.  I am no longer ashamed of those tears – I’ve gotten over that part.  Nevertheless, I don’t want to start crying until at least mile 17 of the marathon!  I do have to contend with snazzy snow storms currently but these are details right?  It’s time to engage the booster pack of my training!

see all of those snowflakes?  why yes, this is the 10 day forecast
see all of those snowflakes? why yes, this is the 10 day forecast

*I’m really hoping the other brand of oranges is actually called Lil’ Darlin’s.  Otherwise I am getting it mixed up with a local strip club… I wish I were kidding.

don’t be bitchy to your cheering squad

Here is the thing, the race on Saturday had some other odd moments that I didn’t include in my race recap.  I’m including them here because I think “weird” is funny!

1.  I was at the “souvenir” table at the end.  The woman behind me was cursing her 1/2 experience up and down.  Her mom was trying to say how proud she was of her and the woman wasn’t having it.  She was being so bitchy!  She told her mom the pain she was in was worse than child birth and her mom couldn’t understand as she had never run a half.  Then the woman started griping about not being able to see the merchandise because there were a few of us in front of her.  I wanted to smack her.

I don't think a 1/2 is more painful than this
I don’t think a 1/2 is more painful than this

2.  The 5k and the 1/2 shared part of the course for a while.  The pacers and volunteers made sure we all kept to our sides but the 5k-ers pushed through us anyway.  It was really rude.  One guy kept running up on me (and breathing down my neck) and then would stop to walk.  A few minutes later it would happen again.  Annoying.

3.  I went around two women toward the end who were walking and then went back in front of them because the street was flat there.  One woman yelled at me, “No one likes a bragger!”.  WTH?

4.  A fellow runner was struggling a bit and she needed to walk a bunch.  Cool – congrats on running a 1/2 – it’s tough!  Then she would come up on me and ride my heels – over and over.  And over.

5.  My favorite volunteer was the woman standing off to the side, smoking a cigarette and barely ringing her bell.  I’m betting this was community service!

6.  I was washing my key (for the millionth time) and this little girl was also playing in the water.  Her dad who had just run the 1/2 and clearly looked like he had run several was standing next to her.  She looked at me, “I didn’t know you could wash a key”.  Me: “haha, you can’t but I dropped it in the porta potty”.  The little girl looked horrified.  The dad and I started laughing and he said, “it happens”.  These are the runners I love.

she looked very similar to this!

7.  This was the first 1/2 for a ton of people.  Many of them cried at the end.  I watched two women embracing each other at the end, crying and it gave me chills.  Loved it.

8.  As I mentioned the volunteers were incredible and there were a lot of spectators.  We ran through a lot of neighborhoods and there were people just hanging out in their driveways cheering for us.  It was neato.

9.  At first I could feel myself slipping into, “this is so not the pace I wanted to run at!”.  Then major turn of head and heart as I realized who cares!  I’m running a freaking half marathon!  My mantra became, “I can do this”.  I am proud to return to distance racing and proud I did it.  Pace smace – I did great!

10.  It was good practice and also highlighted where I need to do some work.  I was pretty sore Sunday.  My quads are weaker than they should be.  I also need to make sure I am hitting my long runs on the weekends.  Dopey is coming.  Dopey is also going to be painful.

it's coming...
it’s coming…

my brain is full

WARNING!  This post is going to have no order to it whatsoever.  Probably a lot like my 15 thing Friday post but perhaps a bit worse.

Alright, now that I have that PSA out of the way, here we go:

1)  I started using My Fitness Pal yesterday.  I know, on Friday I mentioned it seemed tedious and it wasn’t “my style”.  Well, obviously, my style isn’t working for me so I decided to give it a go.  Here’s the thing – this has two perks.  One it will help keep me on track.  Two, it will make sure I am getting enough nutrition for training.  I tend to nickel and dime away my calories on crap food that isn’t going to help my overall health and once again, I am giving this training some actual thought!  The crazy thing?  Yesterday I ate 200 calories over my allotted and I was surprised that in 5 weeks I would stay at the same weight.  Oh calories – you sneaky lil’ bitches!

2)  I love having women friends.  But sometimes women acquaintances are more than I can handle.  Why do we compete with each other?  Why does one have to have more male attention than the other?  This vexes me to no end considering I think it’s a serious waste of energy.  I typically just back down because it drives me bonkers.  I’m probably not going to win anyway.  But then I feel like a doormat.  Any suggestions?  I did find this quote helpful to put perspective on the “mean girl” aspect though (okay, why didn’t the mean girl thing stop after high school?!)

bitterness quote3)  I’m turning into a total baby with running in the heat.  Of course, I could get up early and do the miles when it doesn’t feel like I’m running on the surface of the sun but so far, I’ve liked my bed too much to do this on a regular basis.  But July isn’t here yet and July makes my curls look like I put my finger in an electrical outlet which also means running is going to get even more disgusting.  What do you do to get out on the pavement?

4)  You know the iced coffee recipe I posted the other day?  This has cut my calorie content of my dear favorite cup of joe considerably.  Before I think it was clocking in at a decent 275-350 range.  Now?  175!  I even tried to overestimate a bit just in case.  Considering this and the quickness factor, I am quite pleased with how this experiment turned out.

5)  I also mentioned last week I was going to try Borax as a cleaning aid.  I still haven’t yet but I can’t say the word “Borax” without some kind of really bad Russian accent (yep, just a peek into my brain!)

6)  Last week, my ADD post got some really amazing feedback.  I really appreciated the support and hearing others’ stories.  It wasn’t meant to be a depressing post – in fact, it really helps me to get a better understanding of myself.  Does this make sense?  Not to mention, one of my 2013 goals was to get a handle on my health and this really helps.  As LovingHomemade commented, even if I never get an actual diagnosis, simply learning new tricks that ACTUALLY work for me is a major breakthrough!

6a)  One trick that has already helped has been to ask myself, “how will I feel if I DON’T do this?”  I’m surprised at how asking this question gets me moving because suddenly I am accountable.  Heck, it even got me to the pool last week!

7)  I’m still working on my motivation wall.  Ironically, I want it to be perfect and all-encompassing.  Lame.  So after a movie with friends today I am going to

8)  5 miles on the docket tonight.  It was supposed to be done yesterday but the couch won.  As did picking up some summer essentials, talking to my dad and going grocery shopping.  I will have the mileage down for the week so that counts for something in my chaotic book!

il_340x270.453886314_6gadThere you go – some Sunday thoughts that have been rattling around in my brain.  I am currently wearing some shorts with little anchors on them and they are making me feel quite sassy!  Enjoy the rest of your day and try not to let the impending work week dull a delightful Sunday!

dean winchester and I talk about the dopey challenge

*Caution:  I just discovered Supernatural gifs… my life is a little more complete and I am not ashamed to admit this.  Just be prepared, okay?  I’ll start to wean myself off in the near future!

Is it just me, or has there been a huge increase in seat belt commercials?  Who isn’t wearing their seat belt these  days?  I don’t get it.  It’s like that joke about why do we need toilet paper commercials – who doesn’t use this?!

The last few days the Dopey Challenge has been on my mind a lot.  The images range from crossing the finish line of the marathon/last race triumphantly, to recovering in some Pro Compression socks by the pool to an all out melt down around mile 8 of the marathon while cursing the day I signed up for this ridiculous feat.

Hmmm… it’s still months away.  I’m already nervous.  I’m completely screwed.  I realized last night as I was laying in bed I will probably have a freak out each month leading up until the middle of December when it will be happening more often.  I’ve read over a few things about Dopey and some people think it will be tougher than running a 50 mile race because it’s stretched over four days.  So my legs will tighten up and then be expected to move again the next day.  Interesting.

BUT, all of this warped anxiety has had the whole, “MUST TRAIN” effect.  This is a positive.  This was also how I felt about tackling my first half marathon.  I still don’t understand it but I was more nervous for my half marathon than I was for the full.  Maybe because it was my first real long distance race.  Who knows.  I did stick with a training plan for that and ran a nice 2:04, which remains my half PR to this day.  Without even meaning to, I did speed training (with my running mates), long runs and tempo runs.  My training plan for Dopey includes all of this along with some cross training.

I do feel building this foundation is a good set up for training.  Get this, said training plan starts in the middle of June.  This feels absolutely crazy to me but I am also anxious to start.  I want to be on the road with this puppy.  I am thinking this will help calm my nerves when I am actually working on it.  Or I’ll simply be more neurotic than normal!

And some new running gear came in the mail today!  Wahoo!  I ordered a new sports bra (I bought one from a cheaper place and low and behold I bought the wrong one.  Once again, I didn’t follow my own advice!)  I also got a pair of long Rogas from Oiselle.  I found them on sale last week and I am super excited to try them out.  In fact, BOTH packages arrived today and I was so pumped I broke out some robot dance moves.  And then did this:

I could watch this all day

Moving on to a different topic without any type of functional transition… I really enjoy the Hungry Runner Girl’s blog.  I appreciate her upbeat attitude and the times when I have sent her an e-mail her responses were very genuine and kind.  I was reading the other day and realized that at every meal she has some kind of fruit or veggie.  I am all for fruits and veggies but I forget to add them to my meals.

I die… I also need to get some watermelon

I’ve been working on doing this as well.  Breakfast is easy because I am a banana consuming freak.  Lunch I seem to struggle a bit with and might need to start hitting up the cafeteria more so I can utilize their salad bar.  For dinner, I’ve started to work on eating a smaller portion of the main course (or just one serving – I know, the HORROR) and then having some fruit with it too.  It also seems to be easier during the summer and hopefully I can make it a habit.  Exciting stuff people!

dopey vs. goofy

It came down to a battle… a battle royale if you will.




In the end, it really wasn’t that much of a fight.  I already had decided I was going to attempt the Goofy race at Disney World (doing the 1/2 marathon Sat and then the full on Sun) next year and then I didn’t get into the Chicago Marathon so I decided doing the Dopey (doing the 5k, 10k, 1/2 and then the full over 4 days) was a nice balm to soothe my hurt feelings – thanks a lot Chicago.  Not to mention, Dopey is PRICEY! so not getting into Chicago actually made it possible for me to afford it.  I still haven’t decided if I am going to check out any full marathons for fall but I am leaning towards sticking to shorter distances.  I do think some of my burnout this past year can be attributed to trying to do “all the races” instead of sticking to one and calling it good.  I will admit to getting sucked into posts on twitter, facebook and blogs that detailed their latest race.  I would read them and think of myself as a slacker for not signing up, too.  Ah well, live and learn.


So, the Dopey.  You might be wondering why I think I can possibly pull this off given my blog posts as of late.  Trust me, I thought about this too – could I really do it?  Did I have enough faith in myself to actually train consistently and well in advance?  Where would I find the motivation when so often I talk about how lackluster it is?  These are all quality questions and I did think these through.  Because I love a good bulleted list, here is what I have:

1.  I want some redemption on this race course.  While this primarily speaks to the marathon course, I would love to have some happier race memories from Disney World.  I figure if I race all of them, this is bound to happen.

2.  I’m placing a lot of faith and hope in these new meds.  While I haven’t been promised to feel like a new woman, I have been told I will feel BETTER than I have in the past year.  This bodes well for my motivation and overall attitude.

3.  Determination – I “haz” it.  Or at least remnants of it that currently need to be fed and nurtured a bit.

4.  A group of us are taking this plunge together.  We have all worked together at one time or another and realize this is going to be a painful experience.  But I think being in pain with friends is so much more fun then being in pain by yourself.

5.  Perhaps my biggest “let’s do this” moment was when I decided I wanted to use this as an opprotunity to raise money for Epilepsy Awareness.  Like I mentioned last week, I want to make something good come out of this recent hell experience and this seemed like a good idea.  I will be happy if I raise any amount of money.  I have some different ideas of ways to raise the funds and hopefully I will find support from friends, family and the blog community – whether that be in monetarily or simply a “Yay Amy!”.

check out this site!  it's great and super informative!
this is a great initiative – check it out!

So there you go – this was my thought process as I filled out the entry form and committed my legs to this feat (ha! see what I did there?!).  I am absolutely nervous but recognize that individuals run 50 mile races in ONE DAY so I can certainly run 43.5 over the course of 4.  Oh yes, and if you have heard, there is a multitude of shirts and medals.  This certainly makes my heart sing.  Like anything with me, it always sounds like an amazing idea in the beginning and then it becomes real and I wonder what the hell I was thinking.  Essentially, I am planning for this to happen so at least I won’t be broadsided with these feelings.  Seriously, it’s an adventure right?!