randomness

Be prepared…

Get this – I worked out on MONDAY!  No kidding peoples, this is unheard of for me.  Now, I’ve worked out on both a Friday AND a Monday.  Man, I love cloneAmy.

I got 3.5 miles in on Monday and 3.5 on Tuesday.  Tonight will be a rest day since I’m headed to a friend’s house for dinner.  When she asked me about any dietary restrictions, I felt like a giant pain in the ass.  I sent her a list of the most problematic ones – not even a list of the bothersome ones.  I think this could eventually even itself out (foods on my no-go list might go to the every once in a while list) but if not then I will be hosting dinners at my place hence forth!

it will be waffles every time

The 8k is a week and a half away.  I think I said I was going to run outside before the race but now I’m not so sure.  I like being all cozy in my apt while watching  Netflix.  Sure, the treadmill is tedious and it is certainly harder for me to run on as opposed to running outside but it’s cold outside.  Please insert all of the whining here.

It absolutely will be a brisk slap in the face when I venture out in the tundra on the 7th but I might as well experience the chill along with running outside for the first time in months (seriously, this isn’t an exaggeration) for some double whammy fun.

press your luck reference – anyone?

I will say, while I am not in super great shape, I’ve been focusing on consistency so I will finish.  And hey!  It’s a distance I’ve never raced before – new PR!  I did order a new running shirt/jacket thing for the race.  I’m going to call it my birthday present to myself.

Yep, next week is my birthday.  It’s weird it got here so fast.  I’m a bit freaked out by it.  I’m attempting to age gracefully but all I can see is that I AM ALMOST 40!  I still don’t understand how this happened.  You know how older folks say they still feel like they are in their 20’s or something?  I do – I feel like I’m still in my early thirties.  Maybe my body is falling apart like a person who is getting older but that’s it.  The rest of me has no concept of where this aging came from.

I do recognize the alternative sucks, I’m being ridiculous and I should be embracing the day of my birth.  I just pictured my life being very different at this age.  I don’t think my life is bad but there are things I want and are ready for and I want them NOW.  Did I mention I am not very patient?

This is a weird post.  There is a possibility of a more coherent one in the upcoming days but the aforementioned birthday is throwing a weird wrench in my mood.  I’m sure things will be a bit all over the place for a few days!

weekly wellness recap

I’ve decided to do a weekly wellness check in – maybe I can help others who are struggling with similar issues?  Also, I want to write out what I am doing to help avoid making the same mistakes and repeat some of the successes.

Mind Arena:

As mentioned, this was an emotional week.  I soak up the emotions of others – especially those I really care about.  I’m slowly learning to turn down my emotional permeability to detrimental or unnecessary emotions but I’m a work in progress on that front.  With regards to people who are dear to me though, all bets are off.  This definitely created some angst to my physical and emotional self.

A good point though was during one or two days when regular work stress was hitting the fan, I was able to utilize tapping to ease it in the moment along with working out in the evenings (more on this in a moment).  Both of these gave me a boost of confidence that in time, I might be able ease more of my current and future physical pain/symptoms.

Oh and I continued to ease my troubled mood with some Parks and Rec each evening – seriously helped.  Not to mention satisfying my craving for waffles (thanks to Leslie Knope for initiating that craving!).  And a wonderful gift from a friend – Trex socks!  I know, how lucky am I?!

when I look at my feet I get happy
when I look at my feet I get happy

Body Arena:

Last week was a three day work out week.  Not as good as the week before, however, I did have 4 work outs, so that’s something!  But I really shouldn’t write about work outs until AFTER they happen.  Thursday night I was all set for a swim.  Unfortunately there was another swim meet.  Instead, I hit 4 miles on the treadmill friends.  It was a struggle.  I REALLY wanted to give up at mile 3 but hung until the end.  Friday was a really bad stomach day but still hit 3 miles – walking, you know, to make sure I didn’t vomit on my cat.  Always a good thing, eh?

ha!

So, a brief recap: Tuesday night, 30 min swim, followed by 3 miles on the treadmill.  Thursday, 4 miles, and Friday 3 more.  This past weekend was a ROUGH one.  The doc did say exercise helps with both the acid issues and IBS but even after stuffing a ton of meds down my throat during the day, I wasn’t able to even slowly walk on my friend, the tready.  The weekend before was bad too and I’m beginning to wonder if my being a lazy-bones during the day has something to do with it.  Or maybe because I push it during the week to make sure I hit my obligations and then once I can let my guard down, my body goes into full attack mode.  On itself.  Hmm… I’m going to brainstorm an action plan and some experiments to see what I can do about this.

In the food realm, I totally laxed on my low-FODMAP diet.  I tried to eat some foods on the no-no list with lousy results.  I did better with the GERD diet, although my stomach didn’t seem to appreciate my efforts.  I do this thing where once I’ve been diagnosed and received my marching orders, my expectations are an IMMEDIATE “I feel better!”.  Perhaps I should give things time to work?  What can I say?  I’m a delusional optimist!

thanks to Kara at It’s a Dog Lick Baby World for tweeting me this! Sorry it’s hard to read but fruit is kinda off the table at the moment.

This week I’m striving for a more concerted effort with eating low-FODMAPs (I think I’ve found a couple of fruits I can eat, smoothie style – got to avoid some scurvy!), swimming at least 2x – it relieves stress/anxiety better than running and more miles on the treadmill.  Also, I will employ some more tapping sessions to head off some of the aforementioned stress/anxiety.

Welcome week!

head v. taste buds v. stomach

Heads up – the following is NOT a pity post!  In fact, I think this applies to many and I’ll explain in just a few… I’ve made no secret about how my stomach has staged a revolution against the rest of my body.  Bless its little heart, I swear it’s trying to mutiny!

Alas, this is not an option (or I hope it isn’t an option – I’ll find out next week what the biopsy results conclude) I’ve needed to make some changes to my diet and eating habits.  Please cue the ominous music because it has been complicated/annoying.

First, there is my brain.  My brain really likes the whole concept of food.  It eyes a portion and says, “Yep, that will fit in the tummy – GO FOR IT!”  My brain also appreciates tasty treats and understands that in order to keep my body functioning that food is a priority.  Go brain.

My taste buds also have a major appreciation for food.  They are all about bacon, chocolate, veggies, fruits, burgers, pizza – quite a lot of things really.  My taste buds do a great job of letting me know when I don’t like something and when I want to eat every ounce of whatever is so gratifying on my plate.  Taste buds, you are fabulous.

Then there is my stomach.  My stomach is the brat of the group and has decided throwing tantrums is the way to get more attention.  I don’t really remember failing to pay attention to my stomach but I guess this is the case since it has let me know LOUD AND CLEAR that it is not happy and has been for a good long while now.

I’m sure you can see where this is going – a mini war has waged in my body.  My brain picks out what I think sounds good and eyes a portion that will make both my stomach (and other bodily organs that rely on fuel, i.e. all of them) fulfilled.  My taste buds are all excited for the impending goodness.  My stomach is crying out “For the love – don’t eat that much!  Don’t eat anything!  I don’t know who I am anymore and you are FORCING me to figure out what I want!  Oh but wait, I am kind of hungry…”  Where things really get sticky is when my taste buds are so enjoying the now unrealistic portion my brain has picked out for me that they completely stop listening to my stomach and say, “screw you stomach, this business tastes GOOD!”  And then I feel like this:

So there you go – a little insight on what has been happening for months now.  I honestly feel better when I am not eating but at the same time, I’m hungry – so again, my stomach is being that person in the relationship that can’t figure out what it wants.  Which, if you’ve been in a relationship like this, and trust me, I have been, you know how freakin’ annoying it is.

I’m slowly getting my brain and taste buds on board with the wants and needs of my stomach.  Copious amounts of dairy are no longer on the table and gluten is still a no-go.  I think this has helped.  I’m working on stopping myself, even if it means not being part of the “clean plate club” and listening to my stomach when is says things like, “I’m full, you dummy” (my stomach isn’t very respectful these days).  I’m also trying to reconfigure what portions are right for me, despite me looking at it and feeling like it doesn’t look like enough food.  Lame, I know but I still can’t figure out what is going to be right.  For instance, I had a bit of sweet potato casserole left and I was making a BLT for lunch.  I was very hungry as my meetings went late and it was 2 pm before I could eat.  While the bacon was taking a lifetime time to cook, I pulled the sweet potato casserole out and scarfed it down.  Then I ate the BLT.  Then I felt sick.  I can’t find the happy medium.

I realize eating smaller meals throughout the day is advised and would probably be helpful but then I feel I am simply nickel and diming my calories away (this is my brain getting in the way).  I know trial and error is the way to go but error = feeling crummy.  I am beginning to realize this is probably my new normal so I should figure a better way to cope than laying on the couch.

Now, again, not a pity post – I swear.  I started this a few days ago and while I’ve thought about how to conclude it, I’ve realized this is a conundrum that people face all the time.  Whether someone is trying to gain, lose or maintain weight I’m guessing there is conflict within themselves on how to accomplish this.  And let’s not even get into when feelings (<– eww, gross!) get in the way.  Simply because someone’s body isn’t reacting quite the same way mine is, doesn’t mean it’s not just as tough.  So, I salute you all who are learning or have already figured out how to listen to the trio of your brain/taste buds/stomach – they are a pesky bunch!

Oh and send advice if you have!