weight loss

To be honest, there are times when I am incredibly ashamed to talk about my weight loss.  I feel embarrassed that I had gained so much weight in the first place.  Then other times, I feel almost defiantly proud, because a) it was HARD,  b) I did it!  I am a success story!  And c) being overweight is so looked down upon in our society and I feel I SHOULD be ashamed.  My weight loss story definitely defines a piece of who I am as a person and it’s an integral part of why I started this blog in the first place.

In 4th grade I discovered emotional eating.  My teacher hated me and was mean to me.  One of my dear friends moved away and I felt really lonely.  I turned to food to make me feel better.  This pretty much defined my middle school years as well and by 8th grade I weighed 150 lbs and was barely 5’2.

this was either 4th or 5th grade

In high school I joined the swim team and the weight literally melted off of me.  I think I lost 20 lbs in the course of 2 months or so.  It was amazing.  However, my senior year in high school I got sick and gained 30 lbs in 6 months from the drugs I was given.  Wow, was this ever depressing!  From this point forward, I was never able to get a handle on my weight and continued to gain.

The spring of 2003, I went to work for Semester At Sea as a hall director on the ship that sailed around the world.  Yep, it was phenomenal!  I started to lose a few pounds while on the boat.

I think this was about three weeks into the 110 day journey

After I got back and graduated from grad school I needed a job and found my way to Michigan.  My first year was one of the hardest of my life.  I was intensely lonely.  I used to make a joke that the tv was my best friend.  I was so far from home and didn’t know anyone here.  I would wake up, go into work and have coffee then eat my first meal of the day at around 1 or 2 pm.  I would be starving of course and would just keep eating throughout the rest of the day/night.  By the time I had been here a year, I gained back all the weight I had lost while on the ship and more.  This picture was at my highest weight.

Ummm... yes, I despise this picture

About a month after this picture was taken, I started losing weight.  I didn’t do it on purpose, work was busy, I was nervous – just a whole mess of things.  But around this time, I also made some new friends here and suddenly I didn’t need to feed my feelings quite as much.  My new co-worker also started insisting I eat breakfast and my eating world changed completely.  When it was all said and done, I ended up losing approximately 86 pounds.  I didn’t happen overnight.  A bulk of it happened just by changing my food habits/lifestyle.  Nevertheless, I plateaued after losing 60 lbs and then started to yo-yo.  I also found that I had to literally barely eat to “sustain” this weight loss.  It wasn’t until I started working out that I lost the last 25 lbs and started to realize that a) I didn’t want to starve myself and b) working out had more benefits than just the physical ones.

 

me and my bro - I like this picture MUCH better!

There are still times when I emotionally eat.  The end of 2010 and 2011 were tough and I did find myself gaining about 10 lbs over the course of the year and half from this above picture.  Some of it isn’t too bad but I wouldn’t mind losing 5 or 7 lbs.  I believe once food has become a source of comfort, it always will be and learning to moderate this is important albeit difficult.  I don’t think weight management is easy for anyone and I am sure it will always be something I deal with/work at.  But I am confident that I won’t go back to the old days of being a “chubby bunny”.

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3 Responses to “weight loss”

  1. Karine Collinsworth January 11, 2012 at 2:27 am #

    You are my inspiration , I have few web logs and infrequently run out from to post : (.

  2. Jennifer January 23, 2012 at 10:41 pm #

    Hi Amy! I just saw this entry. I love this picture of the two of us. What an adventure. I’d love to reconnect. Jennifer

  3. Kelly (@LeafynotBeefy) April 25, 2012 at 6:25 pm #

    So inspiring! I am on my own wieght-loss journey…some days are really hard, some days are better, but reading blogs like this helps motivate me and encourage me :)

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